In a glass case on the third floor of the iconic Melbourne stadium is housed a electric pink suit performed in by the entertainer. The concert in front of 100,024 spectators was hailed as a major hit.
It's possible you like his music. You might think he is the finest offering to music the world has ever seen. Or you could adopt a reasonable stance, acknowledging that some tracks are fantastic while others are terrible.
The key argument is that amusement can be delivered diversely. You like what you like. There is not a single method to create art or even Test cricket.
The Unrivalled Depth of Test Cricket
The five-day game boasts unrivalled depth. One struggles to think of another sport where the outcome is so dictated by conditions.
The climate, the time of day, the red ball – the factors are countless. Crucially is the playing surface.
If the long game is a form of art, the pitch is the canvas on which the players craft their legacy.
A Test of Cubism: The Melbourne Spectacle
The recent Melbourne match between Australia and England was an abstract version of cricket, the great game dismantled and reassembled in abstract form.
This is not a endorsement of the pitch which produced a win and the second two-day Test of the Ashes battle.
Allowing 10mm of grass on the wicket, causing 36 wickets being taken in less than a brief period, is not a fair contest between batter and bowler.
A Varied History: The Essence of Test Cricket
But any suggestion this was a diminished spectacle, one that should be qualified as not a proper Test, is mistaken.
Test cricket is a rich tapestry, over two thousand matches and ongoing. Sometimes, like in Melbourne, the ball does all sorts for the pace bowlers. In contrast, it spins sharply on a dust bowl. At other venues, the pitch is dead, other times it spits like a cobra.
The close matches are all the more thrilling due to the investment made during quieter periods.
Adaptation: The True Test
Some factors are tolerated more freely than others.
The argument in Melbourne was that the balance was tipped too far towards the bowlers. That the top batters were hindered from playing their natural game.
The format is about adapting to challenges – reading the wicket and adjusting accordingly. The top two individual contributions were made by world-class players. One side committed more errors than the other, and thus were defeated.
Pure Elation: The Supporters' View
Attempt to convince the fans who have experienced 18 winless matches that this wasn't compelling.
In a corner of the stadium, a sea of people made noise and created an atmosphere, producing a party atmosphere in a stronghold of sport.
There was belief as the fielding side excelled, momentum when players fought back, and pure joy when the win was confirmed.
Extreme Ends: The Variety of Test Matches
The Melbourne has a history with difficult wickets. In the past, a match there featured a pitch with the excitement of a pulled Christmas cracker.
That match was a grind, with minimal action and interminable tedium. The latest encounter and that slow Test are polar opposites of the spectrum – both are not the standard, yet historical weight can be found in them.
At this stage into the current series, it is the two-day matches that will be most remembered in the collective consciousness.
"It's not the end of Test cricket at all," said a veteran. "Spectators who have been fortunate to see these two days have been treated to some real entertainment. A unique show."
Baby Steps: A Glimmer of Hope
In the preparation to this Test, the leader talked like a man carrying the heavy burden on his shoulders.
The squad protected him, bringing back the joy to his face.
New faces delivered with key contributions. These are incremental gains, hardly enough to secure long-term stability, but a foundation to build on.
Ultimately, this Melbourne victory joins other notable performances in similar circumstances.
As the fans departed into a stunning sunset, the squad congregated on the field to begin their own festivities.
Enjoy the drink, men. This victory was hard-fought.
